We give them away.

2004-06-19 5:34 p.m.
aninchbeyond

Username/Diary Title [4/5]- I like your username. It's very original, and I'm intrigued. An inch beyond where? This username attracted me hence I clicked on it and decided to review this diary. I would really appreciate a write-up on this username, how it came about etc., because I think it's different from the usual usernames you see on Diaryland, like those with "angels" and "fallen" in them, and most of all, it doesn't have the annoying numbers and hyphens in it. The diary title, although short, is sweet. It suits the layout, which is something good to me, and it somehow gives me the impression that you are a delicate person who is almost fragile too. However, I think it would be much better if you can come up with a beautiful sentence about being delicate and all as it would look nicer in the title bar.

First Impression [9/10]- Some people may be blinded by all that bright orange stuff, but I'm not, because orange is one of my favourite colours. That is a beautiful orange rose you have there and it captured my heart. The colours go very well together: yellow and orange. This was your first entry and I'm glad that I've chosen you. I like this kind of diaries where it doesn't do much daylogs, and instead offer its readers an insight into the diarist's thoughts and emotions. Everything is neat and organized, although I would prefer the font to be smaller, because in my opinion a smaller-sized verdana would look nicer and suit your writing better. Think about it. And I think I have a good feeling about this diary.

Content [38/40] - Your entries are mostly quite short, and that isn't necessarily a bad thing, because some readers have a short attention span, like me, but for certain entries I think it would be better if you would elaborate more, like in this entry, why did you have a fight with your friend? And that entry doesn't exactly explain in detail the fact that you love to read.

I can relate to you in this entry. I hate having writer's block too, especially when I yearn so much to write something in my diary or anywhere. I reckon this is my favourite entry, because it shows how well you can write, with simple vocabulary. And also, considering that it is the first entry I've read from your diary, and that it had left a good impression on me of your diary.

This entry puzzled me. Why do you have a cell phone when you hate it so much? And what's the good deed that you've done in this entry? I don't understand why an entry that started off with such a happy note had to end off with "God, everything is so messed up." And why did you get to have an online conversation with your favourite writer here? I realise that although you write well, you're not very good with details at times.

This entry showed otherwise though. If only you could write with such depth in each and every entry, I am sure it would be much better for your readers. This must be another of my favourite entries. And yes, in response to this entry, I think you're a better writer than your sister. Does this opinion count?

There are quite a few of your entries which I enjoyed, apart from those mentioned, and their similarities are that they are about you, and detailed. Through them, I got to know you as a person rather than just another insignificant diarist off Diaryland, and they are the ones that convince me that you can write well.

I like how your diary is. The way you write about yourself, your recollections, the things you discover about yourself, or about other things, and your thoughts on it. In a way, your diary serves as the same purpose as mine, the likes of a journey to self-discovery, and I like that.

In conclusion, I enjoyed reviewing your diary and you're going to my favourites.

Layout [28/30]- I believe this is the first time I've seen this layout and I like this because I'm tired of always coming across the same layouts again and again. And I shall repeat, this is a beautiful flower. I don't know if it had been manipulated before, because the darker tinges of orange at the edge of the petals make the flower look more gorgeous. I like that translucent stretch across the image and the word "decliate" imprinted there. Hm..what's the font used for that word? Anyway, there isn't much that I can complain about your layout, except that a smaller font would be preferred.

Grammar/Spelling/Vocabulary [2/5]- A few misused/missing apostrophes, a few typos, a few missing punctuations that you should have. And you tend to have an 'e' being 'ing', like "hopeing" and "rideing". It should be "hoping" and "riding". I don't know if you did it on purpose, or if it's a typo, or if you really don't know how to spell that. Hm.

Contact [3/5]- Guestbook and notes. Surely you can do better than that?

Extras [3/5]- 80 things, cast, profile. Nothing interesting.

Level of: This is where we determine the levels of certain things in your diary. [on a scale of 1-10]
Angst [0]: You write like a mature young adult. No angst found in your writing.
Depression [2]: You did sound upset in some entries, like when you talked about how you didn't want to go to college and some other stuff, but nothing serious.
Happiness [5]: Your happiness, although not really often, is actually quite contagious. It must be the way you wrote it.
Sociability [5]: You don't talk a lot about your friends, but you do have a cast page with quite a number of them.
Boredom [1]: Your day-logging, which isn't a lot, mostly does not bore me because they're short, and for the rest of your entries, I daresay I enjoyed quite a bit of them.
Selfishness [0]: You didn't give me the impression.
Coolness [5]: I was amused at a few of your entries, and I like your writing.
Musicality [3]: I know about your taste in music being predictable, but nothing more.

Three Words: Maturing, Attitude, Different

Your Song: "Through the Rain" by Mariah Carey. I hope you can make it through anything tough that comes your way.

Total Score - [90(including 5 bonus points)/100]

Reviewed by Celine

previous | next